Puerile
by RayOfDarkSunshine
Summary: What do you get when you mix prude, drunk, genius, narcissist, loner, free loader and happy-go-lucky teenagers into one school? A whole lot of awkwardness and calamity, that's what. [Semi-modern AU]


**Title:** Puerile

**By: **RayOfDarkSunshine

**Summary: **What do you get when you mix prude, drunk, genius, narcissist, loner, free loader and happy-go-lucky teenagers into one school? A whole lot of awkwardness and calamity, that's what. [Semi-modern AU]

**A/N: Happy New year everybody!**

Y'know something, I'm not a serious person in fact my friends nickname for me is Joker. So why am I trying to write serious things? Well maybe that's because this fandom is far too serious. I just want to say a few things first before we begin properly.

**Firstly:** This is **complete and utter crack**, I don't mean badly written, not funny crack. I mean decent, well written and revised humorous stuff. Proper writing. My friend Hikari-Artwork over on fictionpress is a huge inspiration, her story 'Manifest' is pure awesome and really funny but it's not really a kids story...so if you're under 16 don't read it. Trust me. Anyway moving on.

**Secondly:** This is an AU so heed that, if you're not into AU's then that's fine. I won't hold you too that but this is mainly because of certain aspects that need to be changed for this story to work. In my prequel 'That's a night' I hinted that the **characters don't know each other** and that's the case. It just works okay.

**Thirdly: **This is set in** modern day **(well, 1995) if it wasn't then it wouldn't work so I'm sorry if you say 'oh that ruins the whole setting of the original Outsiders', yeah well done Sherlock, I know but I don't really care because I'm screwing with other things so why not this. Also some of the ages have changed, well only **Darry **who** is now 18 **but other than that most things remain the same.

I worked hard to get this out before the Season 3 premier of Sherlock (_oh Ben_) so without further ado, Puerile. Enjoy!

* * *

_Chapter I_

_September 4th 1995_

The song on the radio wasn't a comfort, in fact it was an annoyance. One of those digitalised, rave beats that were false and made everybody who listened to it a brainless idiot. Or that might have just been what Ponyboy thought, he didn't like 'popular' music, classic rock and 80's Ska was more his thing. There was no reason behind it, he just liked it. Green-grey eyes fluttered around the room which was more like an office, a very dull one at that, unwelcoming white washed walls and more shelves than normal holding an assortment of books and 'collectables' as Ponyboy had instructed his parents to call them (fact remained though, they were expensive toys).

Sitting up, Ponyboy shut off the radio and headed downstairs. Poking his head into the living room, the teenager noted his mum sitting at the table reading a newspaper, absorbed in its nonsensical nonsense, Ponyboy slipped by unnoticed.

"Morning Ponyboy."

Or so he though. Calling a cheery 'morning' back to his mum, he scavenged what he could from the kitchen and headed back to his room to get a last five minutes of peace before, no doubt, his dad would want to drive him to school. It was the same charade each day, Ponyboy would want to walk, his dad wouldn't let him and the fourteen year old would be driven. It wasn't that he didn't _want _his dad to drive (it was defiantly an asset during the winter) but sometimes the teenager just wanted peace of his own and not be forced into an awkward conversation about grades and college (his dad's favourite topic of conversation). Picking up the book he was reading, Ponyboy flopped down on his bed. He had been in the house nearly three years and it still didn't feel like him. Three years and he still wished for the lights of Oklahoma city.

"Ponyboy, you've got to get to school," Eric, Ponyboy's dad, called.

"Seriously," Ponyboy muttered.

He slipped the book into his open school bag, zipped that up, picked up the apple he had intended to eat and headed downstairs. Too tired to argue about wanting to walk to school, the younger male obediently headed out to the car parked in the drive way. It was an old battered thing but Eric insisted in calling it a classic and Ponyboy hated it. The jerk starting and stopping as well as the really loud engine and lucid colour (orange of all colours) made the car an utter headache. Sighing, Ponyboy slung his bag into the back and slipped into the passenger seat rolling down the window.

"Looking forward to the new year of school kiddo?" Eric asked his son.

"I'm besides myself with excitement," Ponyboy muttered profusely.

"Enough with the sarcasm Pony, it's not like you. I thought you would be excited for your first year of high school. It's not often people skip grades," Eric commented pulling out of the driveway.

Ponyboy rolled his eyes, another of his least favourite topics of his supposed genius. He'd never done an official IQ test, but tests in school had shown he was 'gifted' (another word for unnatural) and had been offered to move up a year. He'd, of course, obliged. Vry much happy to get away from the drooling idiots he had called classmates before but being 'gifted' had also brought bullies who were, as he'd been told, 'jealous' of his mind. Why so many people assumed that bullies were jealous was beyond Ponyboy, he knew that people who were bullies were mean, spiteful people who resented difference and thrived on the pain of others. Where's the jealousy in that shrinks.

"I know, I just want to get this day over with, the first ones are always tough," Ponyboy spoke truthfully.

The rest of the car journey, thankfully, went without much conversation and the auburn haired teenager was happy to escape the clutches of the ugly car. He barely shot a wave back to his dad before disappearing into the school grounds. Walking in through the pupil entrance, he noted the people already clumping (a very accurate way to describe teenagers together, a clump) together in the groups. A few freshmen stood awkwardly waiting for old friends to turn up so they could head into the auditorium for the start of year assembly.

Walking into the main area of the school, Ponyboy realised something: he didn't have anybody to wait on. He had left middle school in a class with people who didn't talk to him. Though maybe being in high school was a good thing. A fresh start, a new...oh who was he kidding. School was school was school. No matter what suffix it had. Elementary, middle or high, they were all practically.

"Hey Ponyboy, over here," he turned and saw Curly Sheppard standing a couple of feet away.

"Hi, Curly," the shorter male returned walking over.

Curly Sheppard was by no means, Ponyboy's friend per se but they had a few short conversations before the end of the last school year. It hadn't culminated into a friendship (as Ponyboy had hoped) but they had gained an understanding enough to occasionally talk or hangout if one of the two were alone. Though Curly was hardly ever alone, charismatic and good looking. He had plenty of friends and plenty of girls talking to him.

"A new school year, don't ya just love it?" Curly asked sarcastically.

"Yeah, it's the highlight of my year," Ponyboy replied with a snort.

"Might as well go and find a place to sit then," Curly said.

Ponyboy nodded and the two headed off.

-0-

"_Do they have to stand in front of my locker?_" Soda thought sullenly.

People always seemed to choose the blondes locker as a perfect place to express their love for each other and by that they always had an intense make out affair. Something that annoyed Soda to no end, it wasn't that it was couples (he was very much happily in a relationship) but it was that it was _always _his locker they chose. What was the gravitation towards it anyway.

"Out of the way gay lord," somebody snapped shoving Soda out of the way.

"_Can this morning get in worse_?" Soda wondered. "_Where is Steve anyway?_"

Right at that moment Steve was currently lying in his bed. The alarm brought an unhappy to the dark haired teens sleep, rolling over he chose to ignore it. For a matter of seconds until it became too much of an annoyance. Hitting the alarm off he sat up and swung his legs over the side after running his hand through his hair before his eyes connected with the clock which proudly showed 8:35.

"Shit!"

In record time Steve managed to do all the necessary morning routine things, that would take anybody else a morning, in less that five minutes before bolting out of the house. Barrelling into the school he came face to face with the blonde friend of his. Soda raised his eyebrows questionably waiting to catch his breath.

"What happened?" Soda asked.

"Overslept...Alarm...8:35...Missed the bus...New record...Ran here..." Soda rolled his eyes. "Is it just me or is everything spinning?"

"Here's something. Don't run if you don't usually run, it's not good for you," Soda confirmed.

"I'll remember that," Steve retorted.

Soda grinned and rolled his eyes, turning to face his locker the people had moved aside and the blonde just about jumped in joy. Leaping towards his locker, he threw it open and shoved his bag inside even though the objects itself was completely void of objects bar the lunch his mum had made and the few pens which were now resting in the teens pocket. Smiling in contentment Soda turned to face Steve.

"So, this year?" Soda asked.

"Going to be like any others dull, boring and pointless," Steve answered.

"Why don't you drop out then?" Soda asked.

The two has often discussed whether they would actually drop out but neither of them did. Mainly because in Steve's case his dad would probably throw him out completely and Soda, despite not actually doing well in school itself, wanted to get a few qualifications. Besides neither of the two teens wanted to be working in a garage all their lives. Passing the auditorium the two peered in at all the new students and laughed thinking about how that had been then two years prior despite it feeling like longer.

"I hope none of these freshmen are as annoying as the ones last year," Steve commented towards Soda who nodded in agreement.

-0-

"I'm going to give you three free digs before you're not allowed any more, okay," Two-Bit bargained.

"So I can commented that you're a developing alcoholic, you're failing school and you're 18 and a junior?" Darry replied.

"Hey!" Two-Bit snapped but it was all in good humour.

Besides it wasn't like the 18 year old cared. He knew Darry spoke the truth and if you take everything in good humour then nothing can't hurt or that's the way Two-Bit say things, life was a thing to be enjoyed not hoarded and even if it caused you pain then as long as you could laugh about it at the end then it was time well spent. Unless you ended up dead but that was debatable. Darry wasn't entirely like that and many people questioned how the two whole completely contrasting views got on so well. Maybe it was because they needed each other to function or maybe it was because they had no other friends. Probably the latter.

Unlike a large majority of the students in the school Darry was looking forward to the year ahead. A senior and captain of the football team had its advantages, mainly because they were left to their own devices since they were seen as 'adults' now and that suited him just well. Two-Bit was happy enough to remain a junior, not as much responsibility in his eyes.

"How does it feel to be a senior?" Two-Bit asked.

"Not any different, they're just words Two-bit," Darry replied debating whether to add a sarcastic quip at the end.

"Really, you're not looking forward to being able to kick those freshmen around?" Two-Bit asked with a laugh.

Darry paused and looked to his ginger friend who was grinning questionably. Laughing slightly the two continued on their path down the corridor.

"You're not meant to kick freshmen around, you're meant to guide them," Darry replied trying to not add sarcasm.

"Yeah guide them in the wrong direction. Don't you remember when we were that age and all the seniors sent us in the wrong direction, made fun of us?" Two-Bit asked.

"Which is why we're going to be better examples, maybe it would be a good idea to act your age instead of your shoe size for once," Darry said with a smile.

Two-Bit grinned and rolled his eyes expressively. He had no intention to act his age, at least not for another few years.

"Maybe you should act your shoe size and not your age, you're too uptight," Two-bit said honestly.

"I don't really care," Darry replied before pausing. "Sometimes it's better to do well, maybe you'll figure it out."

And with that Darry disappeared into his registration class leaving Two-Bit to wander off on his own. Opening the door to his own registration class a feeling of dread settled in the teenagers stomach as he glanced across the room. Since he was held back a year, he was more or less just shoved into a class that had spare room and this class also happened to be the one that Dallas Winston was in. Though right now he looked asleep, head resting on the desk. His face obscured by roughly cut blonde hair. Sighing, Two-Bit slipped into a seat near the front of the class.

It was wrong to say people didn't like Dallas, he did have his own friends, _he_ just didn't like people and Two-Bit knew this all too well. Half the school knew this all too well. Slumping down in his chair and looking towards the front, the ginger smiled.

"This is bound to be interesting."

* * *

**A/N: **Oh boy, first chapter. No I don't know how American school days work, I'm not American, so I just did it they way I knew how. Hope you liked it. Oh and yes, this chapter does lack Johnny...oops. He'll be in the next one. An Abundance of Johnny's...new book? (Get the reference) Bye~


End file.
